nice day out today..... but... i'm fucking exhausted, so i can't properly enjoy it.
the sky is blue..... the plants are all green and alive.... it's like everything is right with the world again. fuck, even the ass trees don't smell so bad today.
i've been laying on the futon, in the fresh air, letting the sun warm me. looking at my reflection in the tv, because the way light falls on the body fascinates me to no end.
this is incredibly refreshing after dispair has been running rampant. i feel so fucking bipolar, just like this month is, with its transition from winter to spring. i'm laughing and smiling and finger chewing and then i'm looking down and ready to cry.... it's odd to have my feelings juxtaposed like this. i feel like i have some weird emotional chiaroscuro going on.
sunday mornings are like, the best time ever in atlanta. half the town is in church, the other half are all hung over.... so there's no one out. it's pretty nice.
i've come to the conclusion that i hate winter. i like fall... and even deep fall.... but, winter sucks. in fall the air is crisp, like biting into a good apple. winter is just full of biting coldness. actually, i believe i prefer spring to summer (were i not living the the bradford pear village). summer is only fun if you're at the beach. inland it's just sweltering and miserable.
but, i like fall and spring when they're the closest to winter and summer, not in the early stages.
oh... i dunno... i'm babbling. i need to sleep.