i've lived in this apt for damn near 3 years now and i have received two menus a week from you this entire 3 years. i know it's not because your menu changes that often, because i've looked at every single menu you've crammed in the space beside my door for the trainwreck factor and it's always the same.
i don't fault you for not knowing that i hate chinese food and therefore will never be in need of your services. i'm sure your skilled $5.15 an hour marketing team can't quite work that one out. i'm brutally offended by your lack of regard for trees, and the shitty kinkos print job on your menu. if they didn't look like shit, people wouldn't throw them out, so you wouldn't have to print 10 million of them.
and twice a week?? that's a tad excessive. i want to save them up for a few months and walk into your store and throw them up on the register and bitch you out. it's a pain in the fucking ass opening the door when i'm late for school and hearing your shitty menu fall on the ground and having to pick it up. i want to kill you all.