alicia (fuzzdecay) wrote,

  • Mood:
humor me, please
(borrowed from nova_starr)

my printer just completely ran out of ink in the middle of a long span of prints. awesome!

my birthday is in exactly one month, 13 hours and 50 minutes. and then i'll be 22. which i'm assuming is a lot like 21, but less special. i guess all my special birthdays are over with. oh well!

i came to the realization today that i don't think i'm fat. i know that sounds stupid, but i've spent the last 3 years feeling like shit about myself because i gained 60 lbs due to an unfortunate incident with birth control pills (they should really tell you that they control birth by making you feel gross and therefore never in the mood for sex). but i was looking in the mirror today and i realized that i'm not fat. i've lost a bit of weight since the year before last when i was at my heaviest (i have no idea how, as i'm even less active now) and i'm within the "healthy" weight range for my height.

i look the same as i did, i'm just thicker.... which is probably a good thing, because at my skinniest my head looked too big for my body. and i dunno, i've found some sort of peace within my skin. it's always been an issue for me because a lot of the time i don't feel really connected to my body at all. i feel like my brain is housed in my body, and can feel with my body, but isn't really connected to it most of the time (if that makes any sense at all). it's only during moments of extreme stimulation that it registers that my body is a part of me. maybe i'm in the process of overcoming that?

wow... /girlyness

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