i expect him to be online when i open aim like he still lives 4 hours away from me. i'm drawn in. i forget my surroundings. i forget that he won't be online talking to me because he's online doing other things and we're 3 feet away from eachother sitting in silence because my playlist has played through 4 times and i'm sure he's tired of the songs. i remember i used to only see his face in a 1"x1" window through a shitty webcam. now i see the back of his head.
i think i'm retarded sometimes.... like i get overly emotional. like something's wrong with me. i dunno. i think i need more cuddling. and less stress. i want shawn's car to be fixed and i want to be financially stable. those are the only things really stressing me out. i can deal without a car... i can continue walking to and from school... it's not so bad.
a chinchilla would be nice. something nice and fluffy to play with. and chase around the house. and keep from destroying stuff..... much more of a hassle than fish. i want a black chinchilla so i can put it on shawn's head and see if i can tell a difference before he puts wax in his hair.
i need to draw some hands. i haven't even started. it's due tuesday. maybe i should start.