alicia (fuzzdecay) wrote,

  • Mood:
the nice new shininess of the dsl has worn off. it's wicked fast and i like being back.... but now that the temptation is back i'm like "ehhhh..... what about homework?" Now shawn and i sit 3 ft away from eachother for hours barely uttering a word to eachother. i'm staring at the back of his head.... i want to say something but he's busy trying to set up a forum and i don't want to bother him. He has such a hard time trying to connect with his server with dreamweaver.


i expect him to be online when i open aim like he still lives 4 hours away from me. i'm drawn in. i forget my surroundings. i forget that he won't be online talking to me because he's online doing other things and we're 3 feet away from eachother sitting in silence because my playlist has played through 4 times and i'm sure he's tired of the songs. i remember i used to only see his face in a 1"x1" window through a shitty webcam. now i see the back of his head.

i think i'm retarded sometimes.... like i get overly emotional. like something's wrong with me. i dunno. i think i need more cuddling. and less stress. i want shawn's car to be fixed and i want to be financially stable. those are the only things really stressing me out. i can deal without a car... i can continue walking to and from school... it's not so bad.

a chinchilla would be nice. something nice and fluffy to play with. and chase around the house. and keep from destroying stuff..... much more of a hassle than fish. i want a black chinchilla so i can put it on shawn's head and see if i can tell a difference before he puts wax in his hair.

i need to draw some hands. i haven't even started. it's due tuesday. maybe i should start.
Tags: art school, boyfriends past and present, car stuff, emo, geekery, girlyness

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